A Unique Name

     You can say whatever you want about my name, but you’ll have to admit it’s unique. Sometimes I wish my parents had at least checked what it meant in English online or something before naming me after one of the most dangerous illicit drugs known to man, but I definitely don’t hate my name. Its intended meaning is supposed to be “compassion” in some language from the Indian subcontinent — probably Sinhala or Sanskrit — but no one really cares when I tell them. I can’t blame them, though; the English version is definitely more memorable and significantly funnier.

    Obviously, I’ve gotten a lot of dumb jokes about my name, but I’ve been used to it since about 8th grade. Nowadays, the only thing that pisses me off is when people say “Is it short for Methamphetamine?”, or “Can I call you Crystal Meth?”, as if I haven’t already heard those ones fifty times before. I’ve heard enough jokes at the expense of my name that at this point, I’m relieved when I hear a new, actually funny one. Be as offensive as you want when you trash my name, but for God’s sake be original. 

    Most of the time, though, my name is actually kind of fun. Whenever I hear the word ‘meth’ in the context of the drug itself, I feel like that one reaction image of Leonardo DiCaprio pointing at the TV in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood (I’ll include the image so you know what I’m talking about). It made watching Breaking Bad way more fun, too. 

    To conclude: my name can be kind of a pain in some moments, but I wouldn’t even dream of changing it (that is, unless I can’t get hired because of it or something, but in the meantime I’m sitting pretty).